If I go into The Darkness.

You don't seem to realise that it doesn't matter how much pain you've put yourself through.
No matter what the amount of pain was you were still just looking for relief.
It gets worse and worse, I know.
You have told yourself you don't matter too often.
You matter so much to me and so many others.
This pain means something I am sure.
I wish I had made an effort to keep my life as it was.
Six months ago.
It was so much simpler.
I managed to put the knife down so easily.
I had never looked back.
I made the effort to keep life good.
I listened to the reasoning.
I lived by it and tried to understand.
I let it all go.
I foolishly gave up and can't seem to get it back together.